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If you have lost someone close to you during this past year, you may find yourself having difficulty getting into the “holiday spirit”. We hope this will help you find peace and comfort, and helps you cope this holiday season.

More than ever, you will probably find yourself missing your loved one during this time of year. Please remember that it is okay to allow yourself the emotions you are feeling. Allow yourself to cry, but then make sure to find time to do activities that make you comfortable, such as reading a book, meditating or exercising.

Finding ways to commemorate your loved one is an excellent way to help yourself through the holidays as well. You can do this in many ways, such as visiting places you did in the past with them, or talking about wonderful memories you had with others who were close to him or her.

Please accept help from others. Your friends and family may not know what to do or say, but they may help in other ways, such as assisting you with sending cards, cleaning your home or possibly even cooking Christmas dinner. It is important that you allow them to, as the extra stress from the holidays can become overwhelming when you are already grieving a loss. Also, it will help them cope as well, as helping you through the holidays will give them a sense of involvement in your life in a time when they are at a loss when it comes to being able to make things better for you.

And lastly, remember that it is okay to celebrate, even though you are grieving. Most likely, your loved one would want you to be enjoying yourself, focusing on the good and happy times you have spent in the past and will spend in the future.

We hope to have helped you make the season a bit easier for you. We wish you warmth and comfort this holiday season.

We all know that weather affects our mood, so it is no surprise that the fall season affects our feelings of grief. Whether your loved one passed away in the fall, the cooler air and shorter days are bringing with them a sense of loss or sorrow, or the memories of those we lost on September 11th are affecting your mood, it is important to realize you are not alone.

This coming weekend, the media will be covering the events paying tribute to those who lost their lives on 9/11. During this time, it is important to realize that there are many people still grieving today, ten years later, and that this coverage will be difficult for many to watch.

If you start feeling sad, or if you have a sense of grief, first try to find comfort in small things, such as warming up with a special sweater or cuddling up in a soft blanket. Many times, a small but positive activity, or shared seasonal meal or cup of coffee with a friend can go a long way towards stemming grief or sadness early. But please be aware that for some, grief will not be soothed by a small act or comfort. If you or someone you know is having trouble grieving their loss, whether past or present, we encourage you to find a grief support group or counselor.

Fall can often be a difficult time for many. This weekend in particular can be especially hard to deal with. Please take the time to take care of yourself emotionally. Recognize and accept that your feelings are not only normal, but are being shared by a great number of people throughout the country. Then do the things that will not only give you comfort, but bring emotional support and happiness into your life.

Talking about death with aging parents is likely to be emotionally heavy. The topic brings forth an acknowledgement that life is not forever and the feelings of grief that come along with losing a loved one.

Before bringing up the discussion, be sure to understand your parents and their fears. Realize that they may be dealing with the deaths of peers, friends, siblings, and others in their age-range around them, so they may be particularly sensitive to the topic.

Share with your parents how hard the conversation is for you, because of how much he or she means to you and how you can’t imagine being without them. Also share how much you want to treasure the time you have together and how you’d like to help ensure their needs are met, both in life and upon death.

Ask your parents to discuss death with you and be sure to go at their pace. They may need to take their time in talking about death and also regarding how they want different aspects to be handled.

You should determine what your parents feelings and wishes are not only in death, but also their preferences in the event that they become sick or hospitalized.

At minimum, you should find out if your parents have the following already in place: a will, living will, an estate plan, and what your parents’ wishes are for burial, cremation and/or other funeral arrangements. The burden will be removed off of you and other loved ones if a will, living will, estate plan, and pre-planned funeral are in place.

All-in-all it’s important to connect with your parents in this emotional conversation to ensure that you can confidently execute their wishes. Although it’s a difficult conversation to have, you will feel relieved to have a better understanding of their needs and wants.